When my oldest son was three, it was tough getting him to bed. Eventually, one night every time I went to him , he got up again.
It was almost 1:00 in the morning; my husband was working late waitering; I was alone and exhausted. My little son appeared again, this time not at the top of the steps calling, but in the living room. I started to cry, begging him to go to sleep. He looked at me perplexed. He was three but in his innocent eyes all I could see was a controlling, unreasonable force. And all I could see in me was a whining victim. On the surface my problem was: "The Kid Won't Go to Sleep". But my real problem was perception. I wasn't a victim; there was no breach, gross injustice, unconscionable demands -no unfairness by the Gods or anyone else. I needed to stop believing my thinking; it was wearing me out. Life talks to us in pictures. Every experience is a series of pictures, a scene-by-scene depiction of our current point of view. We get to live a physical reflection of the thoughts and feelings inside of us. I was not the person I wanted to be with him - but that wasn't his fault. It was up to me to decide who I wanted to be and to release any thinking that could not support that choice. I was never going to be who I wanted to be if I saw myself as the victim of anything. Who do you want to be? Lots of Love, Jennifer
1 Comment
Judy Kenower
8/26/2013 09:49:53 am
Lovey Jen, as always. It's always good to be reminded of this. And as usual the illustrations are just perfection.
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