When my son was a toddler, I once said he was like a "CEO without a company". He wanted to run something. His preschool teacher complained he never listened to her directives and was "controlling", often telling the other children what to do.
Though charming, funny, smart, and adorable, it was as though he'd come from another life as King and couldn’t quite fathom his new (lesser) position as child. But as he got older, he got happier. He grew able to harness his sharp, old soul mind and put it in service to making life easier.
Still, sometimes I run up against that Boss and it’s challenging. Recently, he and I got into a conflict that left me confused and frustrated. That night I had a dream.
He calls me on the phone - except he is only seven or eight (not 18). The phone rings, I answer, and he says:
"I love you so much. I am so scared."
"What are you scared of?" I ask.
"I love you so much."
"I love you so much too,” I say.
With my son's personality packing so much Boss energy, it's been easy to forget that what can seem dominant and controlling, might be a call for something else. In the text A Course in Miracles, it says that every behavior is either an expression of love or a call for love. Sometimes it's easier to recognize a call for love in one who reads as afraid than in one who reads as bossy. But it's the same call. Now, all I have to do is remember.
What do you need to remember?
From the Inside